Sunday, May 17, 2020

I want to be single but with you!

I want you to go have a beer with your friends, for you to be hangover the next morning and ask me to join you anyway because you feel like having me in your arms, for us to nuzzle against one another. I want to talk in bed in the morning about all sorts of things, but sometimes, in the afternoon, I want us to decide to take different paths for the day.

I want you to tell me about your evenings with your friends. To tell me that there was a girl at the bar who gave you the eye. I want you to send me text messages when you're drunk with your friends, for you to tell me unimportant things, just so you can be assured that I think of you, too.

I want to eat with you, want you to make me talk about me and for you to talk about you. I want us to rant about the Thailand vs. Singapore, Goa beaches versus Kerala waterfalls. I want to imagine the loft of our dreams, knowing that we will probably never move in together. For you tell me about your plans with neither head nor tail. I want to be surprised, for you to make me say: Take your passport; we're leaving.

I want to be afraid with you. To do things I would not do with anyone else, because with you I am confident! To return too drunk after a good evening with friends. For you to take my face, kiss me, use me like your pillow and hold me so tightly in your arms at night.

I want you to have your life, for you decide on a whim to travel for a few weeks. For you to leave me here alone bored and wishing for the small Instagram pop-up with your face that tells me "hi."

I don't always want to be invited for your evenings out and I don't always want to invite you to mine. Then I can tell you about it and hear you tell me about yours the next day.

I want something that will be both simple and at the same time not so simple. Something that will make sure that I often ask myself questions, but the minute I'm in the same room as you, I know. I want you to think I'm beautiful, for you to be proud to say that we're together. 

I want to hear you say you love me and I especially want to tell you in return that I love you too! 

I want to make plans not knowing whether or not they will be realized. To be in a relationship that is anything but clear. I want to be your good friend, the one with whom you love hanging out. I want you to keep your desire to flirt with other girls, but for you to come back to me to finish your evening. Because you will want to go home with me. I want to be the one with whom you love to make love and fall asleep. The one who stays away when you work and loves it when you get lost in your world of "Jewels". I want to live a single life with you. 

For our couple life, would be the equivalent of our single lives today, but together.

One day I will find you (R...).

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